Cuts?Scars?Flaws?

Who have thought they are so ugly? Or so imperfect? Or Have to cut yourself cause you aren't worth it?

I have...like many times, I hate it when people tell me I am useful, I know I aren't. I think I am ugly all the time. I am not perfect, I see some peoples who are just like UGH! They are just Whoa ... Perfect. Everything about them is perfect. And I am here looking like a potato.

WHY DOES IT HURTS WHEN I SEE PEOPLES WHO ARE JUST LIKE PERFECT?

It hurts when I see them. Walk past it makes my heart stop, my nerves stop working. Why should I live if there are people like that? I  AM USELESS! I GOT NO ONE TO BE HELPFUL FOR. It hurts so bad. I cut myself many times because of that. I cut to make sure, I am alive. If I am alive why does no one notices me? If no one notices I am ugly! It makes sense it not difficult at all.. Makes common sense. I am imperfect so many people (Mostly girls) Tell me "Oh, You are skinny, I want your body." "You are so cute. I am so jealous!" Why you got to be jealous? I am ugly. I feel fat, When I look at myself. I AM FAT! so why you want my body? I should be the one who should be jealous. I am useless, I am worthless. So why should I be living? I know one reason. A wise guy told me... (It was a student who was helping me tuning my violin.) His exact words are. "You think other people are so perfect? You think I am perfect? Ha, everyone has flaws. You think you are worthless? Guess what, you are... Ha I can't stop laughing. Okay, let me be serious now. Why are you in this world? Why are you in this world? To make your parents happy. The adopted children, have a reason but they are more happier than you now when they get adopted. You shouldn't be sad because there are more people who gone through so make pain and suffering than you. You have no reason to be sad or think you so imperfect. I fell from the stairs today, do you still think I am perfect? I am not. You aren't ugly. If you think you are. Well, go get plastic surgery." I still remember what he says. It makes me feel better somehow.